__tHe lOvE iS iN mE_

Saturday, February 05, 2005

9 tips on arguing effectively

Compromise: having a little of something to make your partner happy is better than not having anything at all. Think of ways tat u can solve the problem thru giving n taking a little.

Be positive: instead of focusing only on the negative, think about the positive aspects of your relationship. It will keep u in a better frame of mind to address the issues ahead.

Listen: take the time to consider your partner’s views, and show that you have understood what is being said.

Remain calm: getting frustrated solves nothing. If the discussion is getting nowhere, take some time out to cool down. Go for a walk, or simply retreat to another part of the house until you are calm enough to pick up where you let off.

Watch your body language: you may say you are sorry, but if you are gesticulating wildly, the message your partner gets is very different. Make sure that your body language, facial expressions and vocal tone are consistent with what you say.

Say what you mean: you may be afraid to say something or address the real issue at hand, but beating around the bush or being sarcastic about it will make things worse. It is better to get things out in the open so that the problem can immediately be dealt with.

Agree to disagree: you are both two different individuals, so it will be difficult to find a solution that is agreeable to you all the time. If this happens, focus on the positive and end the discussion on a good note. Put across to your partner that while there is no solution at the moment, you will try to work together to find one.

Stick to the subject: talking about events in the past which are totally unrelated to the issue at hand only makes things worse. Stick to the issue at hand if you want a fast resolution.

Respect your partner: never be rude or put your partner down and say hurtful things deliberately. You will regret it after you have calmed down, but you can never take back the hurt which you might caused.

i m guilty of some of the things...

<`scribbled at-
11:58 PM